Monday, December 22, 2008

It's Been a While

****UPDATE****

Thank you all so much for your suggestions about where to stay in Jamaica. We had our travel agent run several of the properties you suggested, but many of them were booked (go figure... with less than a week!) We had a few options, and decided on the Iberostar Rose Hall Suites, adjacent to the Iberostar Rose Hall Beach Resort. Should be really nice!

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Again, it has been longer than I typically like between posts. Here are a few, rather disjointed updates...

12/18/08-- Our 4-year wedding anniversary. Spencer had class, but his classmates were kind enough to devise a ploy to get him out of there so he could come home. We actually celebrated the following evening at a new restaurant that opened near us.

12/20/08-- Ended up on tripadvisor.com reading some pretty horrendous reviews of the resort where we're scheduled to go in Jamaica leaving this coming Saturday. So, our trip is up in the air at this point. We're currently trying to change resorts... we'll see. If we can't, then we're cancelling the trip altogether (gotta love trip insurance!) I just can't deal with the headaches that are possible to encounter based on the reviews. If anyone has any suggestions for resorts in the Montego Bay area, let me know... ASAP!

12/21/08-- Back at our church for the first time in a few weeks, and I am just so thankful for our church. Many of you posted in response to our experience last weekend at my mom's church (the church I grew up attending... which I LOVE). This past Sunday, our Pastor got up and acknowledged that this time of year can be so hard, particularly for people who have recently lost someone they love. Within the last week, a few members of our church experienced the death of a loved one, and our Pastor had them come up so that we as a congregation could pray for them. I am just so thankful that our church is a place where people are known... where you can come as you are, be authentic, and know that you will be met with the love of Christ.

Spent some time at the cemetery as we usually do. I noticed the abundance of wreaths, poinsettias, and other Christmas decor everywhere. It was both beautiful and saddening at the same time, seeing how many people were missing loved ones this Christmas. Spencer also noticed one of the graves in Babyland (the section where Isaac is also burried)... it was from the 1960's (the exact year escapes me) and there was a brand new toy there that we hadn't seen before. Forty years later...and these parents are still remembering and missing their child.

Had a chance to visit with my mom's side of the family at my grandad's house. It was wonderful to be able to catch up, and I am so thankful that my family mentioned Isaac. My grandad and Maria (his wife) had pictures of him up, right along with their other great-grandchildren. My aunt and my cousin asked about Isaac's playground and offered to come and help once construction and installation of it begins. They asked what we were doing to remember Isaac this Christmas... I just love it that people ask. I know I have communicated here that I do sometimes fear that people will forget him; and so being asked those types of things is so good for my heart because it helps me to know he isn't forgotten.

On a different note, I have recently started thinking alot about the relationship between Christmas and Easter, and have started thinking about the crucifixtion in a whole new light. For years, I have thought and even given Young Life talks about the birth of Jesus as the start of God's redemptive plan for humanity... and about Jesus's death on the cross as him bearing our penalty for sin. And both of those things are deeply true.

But lately, I have started thinking about both of those events from Mary's perspective... from the perspective of a mother. I still have a lot to mull over and will write more about it once those thoughts can give form to words.

This post is a bit all over the place, so I will end with a few prayer requests...

1- That we'll figure out what to do with this Jamaica trip... either a new resort, or that we can cancel it. It has me a little stressed.
2- For Christmas... this week is heavily weighing on my heart. I am just missing Isaac so much.

56 comments:

Anonymous said...

I will continue to pray for you during this time. you are still an inspiration to me. Jessica

Anonymous said...

check out the Couples resorts in Jamaica, we stayed at Couples Swept away, and it was wonderful- absolutly no complaints. (it is in Negril, but they transport you from Montego bay airport for free) You guys deserve a great vacation-
Michelle

Kim said...
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Anonymous said...

I just had a friend go to the Couples Swept away resort for her honeymoon too. It may be worth looking into.

Anonymous said...

There's a place called Sunset at the Palms in Negril (maybe a 30 minute drive from MB) that is really nice. It's a more bungalo style resort (not a big hotel), mostly couples, and the staff couldn't have been friendlier. The rooms are clean, the shower is the size of our entire bathroom at home, and the food was great.
I hope you have a great vacation!

Kristina Petrella said...

Dear Stacy- we will continue to pray for you even more this week. That Christ would hold you close.-Kristina

Nicole said...

We stayed at the RIU in Ocho Rios... which is a 2 hr bus ride.. but they have a sister hotel in Montego Bay...
http://riumontegobayresort.com/
Very nice hotel

I have also stayed at the Royal Decameron Montego Beach - also very nice..

Hope you don't cancel your trip.. GO have fun :)

Anonymous said...

I will continue to pray for you and Spencer. Your thoughts on a new connection from Christmas to Easter from Mary's perspective is very interesting.. in all of this, that point of view is often forgotten, the one from the mother. To give birth knowing that she would have to sacrifice her son... that one is difficult to grasp on to. I'm glad your visit at your grandad's was comforting and that people remembered Isaac with you. Merry Christmas!
Alicia

Anonymous said...

We stayed at Sandels Whitehouse for our Honeymoon. It was amazing. You cannot go wrong with staying at a Sandels Resort.

Anonymous said...

I agree with everyone else on the Couples resorts in Negril. We went to Couples Swept Away for our honeymoon last year, and then we went to Couples Negril this year for a vaca. Both were wonderful! (But I liked Couples Swept Away better). It's only about an hour from Mo-Bay, and the shuttle will take you there. You'll love it!

Anonymous said...

We also stayed at Sandal's Whitehouse for our honeymoon. The best vacation we've ever taken!

Monica @ Writer Chic said...

Praying for you, sweetie. Thinking about Isaac and you daily. Don't worry; he won't be forgotten.

Cynthia said...

Thinking of you guys now more than ever. Praying that Christmas is peacful. As for forgetting Issac I never will. He has touched me (and many others) in a way that I did not think was possible.

We too stayed and Couples Negril and it was awesome. We had considered a Sandles resort but wer felt that our money went further. We were able to get the second best room for the same amount that the lowest (or second)room at Sandles went for. Try to enjoy your vacation. You guys deserve it.

Praying for you daily.

Stephanie said...

I hope that you can figure out a way to go on your trip. When we went on our honeymoon there were lots of bad reviews about the resort that we chose to go to, and when we got there we could not have been more pleased. I figured that the people posting horrible things were more 'high class' than we were, expecting everything to be exceptional and perfect. We were uneasy though, so I do know what you mean. I hope you can find a way to go on your trip.

Always thinking of you and praying for you.

Laura said...

Thinking of you and Isaac this Christmas.

Jord, Ali, Halle and Belle said...

Go on the trip even though trip advisor has complaints! You NEVER know!! We went to Punta Cana last year after I miscarried in January and the night before leaving read reviews online..not one said even the slightest nice thing. We really thought we were staying in the slums...and it was the best vacation I have ever been on and I have been on some really nice trips to Sydney Austrailia, St. Lucia, St. John, Hawaii etc. Always stayed in 5 star hotels except in Punta Cana and I would do the entire trip all over again in a second. You can't always go by the opinions of others and I bet you find that you will enjoy just being away from all things ordinary routine.

clkocher said...

We stayed at Sandals Whitehouse this past May It was AWESOME- no complaints! Itis about an hour bus ride from the montego bay airport, but they will transport you. It is on a nature preserve-very quiet and peaceful-you don't see any other resorts when you look down the beach.

Leah said...

We got married in Ocho Rios, Jamaica at the Sandals Resort. If you can get there it is a gorgeous place. MUCH prettier than Montego Bay. MB is flat while OR is very hilly and lush. Sandals is all inclusive and it's just amazing. Good Luck.

Anonymous said...

Dear Stacy,
I am anon poster, but you are in my prayers. We had something similar happen to us, T18 baby, but he passed early, before we met him. I really want to encourage you to go even in the resort isn't the one of your dreams. We went on a cruise about 3 months afterwards. There were many tears, because of course there were families around, but even with the tears and sadness we were away and were able to use that time to begin to heal. Just try to go to a Couples only resort - be easy on yourself, but do go. A change of scenery will help a little.

Verna said...

Remembering you and Spencer in these difficult days. Isaac will always be remembered!

Anonymous said...

I second all the posters who have recommended Couples Swept Away in Negril. We went for our honeymoon and had a wonderful time. I am praying for you as you continue your journey.

amrisser said...

hey Stacy-hoping you can get away this next week-sounds wonderful :) Merry Christmas to you, Spencer, and Sweet Isaac-
hugs-amy

Sherri said...

My daughter and son in law just returned from Couples swept away all inclusive resort in Negril. They had a most wonderful time. Good luck

Sherri said...
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Amy said...

You are in my thoughts and prayers often, and I pray for God to be so near to you both...

Amy

Danielle said...

Did you check out a Sandals? We went to Sandals for our honeymoon and it was absolutely wonderful! :) I'm sure you'd have a blast there!!!!

Anonymous said...

I hope you really know that Isaac will NEVER be forgotten, but so many people, like me, who never knew him, and have never even met you. My son was born this past August, and since the day he was born, we have said prayers every single night--and we include Isaac in our prayers. I imagine that one day, when my son is old enough, he will ask who Isaac is, and I look forward to sharing with him the story of your courage and your faith.
I wish you and Spencer a Christmas season filled with some warmth and comfort, and hopefully some joy--be it in Jamaica or in your own home.

Jen said...

Continuing to pray for you. Yesterday in church, I too began to think more of Christmas and Easter and the relation between the two. They simply cannot be seperated, and when you think of it, it makes sense that Christmas should not just bring to mind His birth, but His ressurection as well. Praying that you find some joy this Christmas- maybe just knowing that Isaac is enjoying Christmas with the savior will help! What a celebration that must be in Heaven!!! May you feel God's arms holding you tightly.

Leah said...

Hope you don't cancel your trip, this would be a good time to get away for a minute. My prayers continue with you.

pollykinz said...

Stacy, you and Spencer are in my heart and prayers this week. I know it will be hard for you, but know that Isaac is safe and peaceful and that there are many people praying for all of you. Lynn

Jennifer in West Virginia said...

Sandals Royal Caribbean in Montego Bay... It is awesome. You also have the ability to go to the restaurants and such at the 2 other Sandal resorts in Montego Bay so you have alot of choices in food and lots of activities that are all inclusive. We went there in 2007 for a week to celebrate our 10th Anniversary and to re-new our vows. Can't wait to go back again.

Chelsea Pang said...

I was forwarded to your blog. We lost our baby Grace Ola to Trisomy 18 at 38 weeks, she was stillborn, lost her heartbeat a few days before. We knew at about 16 weeks via amnio but she had a cystic hygroma too that we found at 12 weeks. I am excited to have found you and hope to keep up with your progress via your blog. Grace was our first.

Jane said...

when you know someone that has lost a loved one.. ie: you losing Isaac.. sometimes it is really hard for us to ASK for fear of hurting you. It isn't that people don't care or remember.. we just don't want to make you sadder. You writing about Isaac and your lives is such a blessing to us all. Even those of us who have never met you in person but feel like we know you thru your posts. We cry with you. We laugh with you. You truly are a real inspiration to all who read your blog.
Today I Pray for Isaac. that somehow you will feel him close to you at this time. That you will know that he is rejoicing with Jesus right now. AND that reunion plans have already been made for when you will see Isaac again. He is a beautiful child. You are very blessed that you had that small amount of time with him. He too is blessed to know he has a mommy and daddy and family that love him very much and yes miss him SO so so much. But this is also a happy time to rejoice in all God's goodness.It is hard to sometimes accept the things that happen..but we have to believe that HE knows best.
Have a Merry Christmas. Celebrate God's love .. Celebrate Isaac. Celebrate the love that you and Spencer have for each other.
May God's grace shine on you both. and know that you are loved by so many people that only know you thru this blog.You really help me at least to stop and be thankful for the things that I have.
God Bless. Jane/Colorado Springs

Christy said...

I am praying and thinking of you and Spencer during this difficult time. I hope you are able to go on your trip, Jamaica is a beautiful place. I think of you and Isaac often.

Drama Queens said...

Hey, I know you don't know me, but...we stayed at Sandals in Ocho Rios last year at this time and we really had a great time. They also transport you from the Montego bay airport and there is no nudity allowed which was a concern for us (I know some other resorts allow this) Feel free to email me at ansjohnson3@msn.com if you want more info. It is not a small resort, but it was only couples there and overall everyone was very nice, kept to themselves, rooms were clean, food was decent, beaches were well taken care of, etc.

LBHC said...

Hi Stacy
Your words about your son are so beautiful. I check into your blog every now and then b/c I know your faith is so strong and it gives me inspiration. You have been through so much, and yet your head is held high and you have not waivered.

About the resort - try a Sandals resort. I haven't been to Jamaica, but a friend went on her honeymoon there several years ago and really loved it.

Erika said...

Stacy- I, too, have been thinking about Mary and what Christmas meant to her, and what Easter meant as well.

My grandparents lost their third and last child, a daughter, when she was three months old (she died in the NICU on their wedding anniversary). Almost 50 years later, they still remember her. In fact, a few years ago, they had her body moved to the family plot so she could be next to them when they die. You never forget, and you always love...and miss.

I'm so glad your family has been so supportive. That is wonderful.

I continue to pray for you, especially this week, when Christmas is weighing so heavily on our hearts.

Vivian said...

You both are in my thoughts and prayers. May God bless you in the coming year.
Thank you for sharing!

ellen said...

Hi....avid reader of your blog here....wanted to say Merry Christmas!

Also, which resort are you looking at? For our honeymoon we went to Sunset Beach Resort and loved it. all inclusive.

Here is the link: http://www.tripadvisor.com/Hotel_Review-g147311-d149881-Reviews-Sunset_Beach_Resort_Spa-Montego_Bay_Jamaica.html

Open your Eyes. said...

I want to let you know I won't forget Isaac whilst celebrating my Christmas this year xxx.

jafamily said...

Sandals resorts are great and there's one in Montego Bay. We stayed at the one in St. Lucia and loved it. We really enjoyed the couples only aspect. I hope yall are able to make your trip!!

Justin and Jessica said...

This might be too late - check out Sandals Montego Bay or Sandals Royal Caribbean - enjoyed both resorts with no problems. :) Sandals Whitehouse is also fabulous - just a little bit of a car ride.

Anonymous said...

HI Stacy,
I've been following your story and recently was sent this link for a song story from Hillsong: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZE33ejdgWIY .
I immediately thought of you and wanted to share it in the hopes that it will help you through this very difficult season in your life. My God bless you this Christmas season. I'll be continuing to pray for you and your family.

Lisa said...

Stacy,

This is the first time I've posted, however, I've been lurking for quite a while.

What prompted me to write this time is quite simple, really. Having miscarried our baby - our first baby, after TTC for 7 years of our 12-year marriage - on 8/29, I so deeply feel your pain. This raw pain deep in your soul that no one can truly understand unless they've experienced it, brought me to this point. When you lost Isaac, my heart bled for you and Spencer. At times I felt so guilty because I actually felt comfort visiting your site. Not from your pain, but in the way you so gracefully and humbly displayed it as a woman who loves the Lord and understands that His way is not always our way.

I also can relate to the church situation, and how it's easy to feel distant when you're hurting. I can show you on one hand the number of times my husband and I have been to our church (which we love) since the m/c. It's an odd struggle for us. We so love our church, our pastor, and everyone there who has offered support. But in far too many ways, it's unbearable. Especially this time of year.

Please know that you've got a friend in Louisville, KY who is praying for your family. Because just like you, although the world sees us as a family of two, we're indeed a family of three.

Much Christian Love to You Both.

Anonymous said...

You, Spencer, and Isaac are in our hearts. Your life and Isaac's life has touched me more than you can even imagine. Your Isaac is so blessed to have parents who love him so much! God bless you and your family!!

Missy said...

Just wanted to stop by and let you know that I am continuing to pray for you.

Mrs. Cup said...

The Royal Plantation in Ocho Rios was amazing!

Praying for you!

LMP said...

I just wanted to let you know that Isaac still crosses my mind each day and I am thinking of you this holiday season and every day. I hope your vacation is still a go and you find some joy and peace under the warm sun.

Jen said...

Dearest Stacy,

I won't wish you a happy Christmas. Such a trite statement for you this year, such a painful one. The idea of joy and memories must make you feel sick.

I ~will~ wish you a precious one, though. Filled love and peace. Take the time to be still. You are loved.

Laura said...

Oh Stacy....I am praying! I so want you to be able to go away on your trip!!! Praying for your heart..everyday!

It's The Little Things... said...

You can do this! A friend once told me that healing is remembering without the pain. Although my story greatly differs from yours in that I miscarried. It was still a loss to me and I have chosen to make the quote I wrote above my New Years goal.

1n 2009 I will remember without the pain...

You can too. I will be thinking of you!

Franz-tastic said...

My suggestion for your trip is:

http://www.jakeshotel.com/

I wish you the best during this holiday season.

Katie said...

Mery Christmas Delisle family. Continuing to keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

Laura said...

I'm so glad you are going....praying for rest and peace.

Grace said...

You can't go wrong with an Iberostar resort. We have been to several in the Dominican Republic and have always loved them. Have a wonderful vacation and a wonderful and peaceful Christmas.

mamapearl said...

Thinking of you so much today...
I hope you two have a wonderful trip!