Tuesday, May 13, 2008


I received this in an e-mail from a dear friend about a week ago and it spoke to the depths of my soul.

by John Fischer

Sometimes I act as if I'm just muddling through life. I'm lucky if I make it through a day. People ask me how I'm doing and I hear myself say -- even to fellow Christians -- "Oh, I'm hanging in there, just barely." Then I remember Christ praying to the Father: "As you sent me into the world, I am sending them into the world," and I have to ask myself: Do I sound like someone who has been "sent?"

If I have been sent, then I am on a mission, and if I am on a mission, how can I just be muddling through life? Somehow I don't think muddling is in my mission statement.

I'm thinking of Paul in 2 Corinthians 2:14-17 where he says that he is always being lead in a public display and is manifesting, wherever he goes, something real about the nature of his faith in Christ, and it is always having an effect on people, and I realize God can accomplish this mission in spite of what is currently happening in my life. Paul even makes this statement right after he has confessed his anxiety over plans not going as expected (verses 12-13). Even then, he could still say he was being lead on a mission.

That means nothing can stop us because nothing can stop God's work in our lives. It would be great today if when people ask how I am, I could say, even if it's just to myself, "I'm on a mission," because I am. I'm on a mission to love God today with all my heart, and let that love reflect in all I do. I'm on a mission to love those closest to me -- to be ruled by care and compassion. I'm on a mission to tell my story to anyone who wants to hear it. I'm on a mission to manifest the fragrance of the knowledge of Christ wherever I go. All this can happen regardless of the circumstances in my life. I don't get to muddle through anything.

In the movie "Saving Private Ryan," a platoon of men in World War II are on a mission to find Private Ryan and bring him home. Sometimes they struggle with their mission. Some of them almost abandon it, but as long as they are moving with the mission of the group, they are all in on it. They were sent.

How about you today? Have you been sent? Then you aren't just hanging in there; you are on a mission. Be aware of it today, and look for what God has for you, because you were sent.

Sent. Lately, I haven't felt sent. I've felt like I have been muddling through life, and on some days, barely hanging in there. But I love what Fischer says about meing on a mission to love God with all my heart and to let that love reflect through all I do, and to be on a mission to tell my story to anyone who wants to hear it, knowing that God's goodness and glory can be revealed through it.

Fischer's words were a wake up call to me as I remember that these current circumstances are part of something much, much bigger, and it's a tool of the enemy to have me take my eyes of God and on the desperation of my circumstances. It's then that you drown... much like Peter when he stepped out of the boat when he took his eyes off Jesus... not because of what the circumstances are, but because of your (and my) perspective.

So today, I've decided that I want to act like I am sent. I don't want to feel like I have to hide being pregnant, but rather feel proud that I am a mommy who loves her little boy, even though he's still in the womb and may end up going straight to heaven. I want the love I have for him, for my husband, for my family, and for those closest to me to be a fragrance of God's love for His people. I want to have the courage and boldness to tell my story to all who want to hear, that it would lend compassion and sympathy to anyone with similar circumstances, and would reflect God's goodness and glory.

I am on a mission. I have been sent.


Lauren said...

Hello, hello! I don't know you but I read about you through Amy Risser's blog (I am baby Norrah's mommy - which is also a link on Amy's blog :))

We have seen miracles in our baby girl and are happily awaiting her birth. As I read all your posts I had nothing but FAITH AND HOPE for your little boy. We are praying for healing for him and for increased faith and peace in you and your husband.

If you need anything, just to talk or pray or whatever... let me know. WE ARE ALL WALKING THIS ROAD TOGETHER!

With love,

Randie Sanders said...

I just wanted you to know I am praying for you. I read about you through Angie's blog and your story touched my heart as hers has. I have not been through your pain but I know the face it has, my very good friend has lost two dear children one at 17 weeks and another at 21 1/2 weeks :( I have FAITH for your little boy and I know Gods plan is perfect. I love the courage that you have to love your little boy in spite of the fact that his future is uncertain. Every baby is meant to be loved supremely. I pray many blessings for you guys.

Jen said...

Hello :) Another stranger here, sent to pray for you. Know that it is an honour and a priveliage to walk this road with you in this way. I like to say that I have the Night-Shift for prayer, because I live in Australia, and I wake up just as you in the US go to bed *wink*
Know also, that not only are you sent, but you are carried by Him as you go.
Be strong, beloved mother... He has charged you with something great; be faithful.

Elizabeth Petrolle said...

What can I say, you are truely an inspiration to us all! What faith and amazing hope you have, it is an honor to go through this journey with you and to call you my friend! Thank you for introducing me to your blog, it is a wonderful journal of your thoughts, feelings, and experiences!

Talk soon,

Sheila said...

I follow your posts on the nest and now your blog. I was going to mention you should check out http://audreycaroline.blogspot.com/ but I see you already have it linked. A similar story - very inspirational. Hang in there.